Misplaced Musings

I love this. I love this because life has been hard lately and knowing, hoping that it will get better is getting me through it.

My beloved grandpa, my mom’s dad, is dying. There is no nice way to put it. He had a stroke two years ago and it has been an uphill battle ever since. When I was in college, I was over at my grandparent’s home so so much and we grew quite close. I am so sad that I have not been able to get down to Florida as much as I would have liked these past few years. I am even sadder watching my mom handle this heartbreak. It’s a pain I never imagined.

I am so happy that my little sister lives there. She is amazing and has been there for our mom and grandpa in such a wonderful way.

My mom has been down there often and right now she has been gone two weeks. Which I know isn’t an eternity but dammit she’s the Lorelai to my Rory and I miss drinking coffee and hanging out.

My parents live down the street (yay!) so while my mom is out of town I’ve been taking care of my dad. Yes, my fifty something year old dad who flew in the Army for 20+ years, fought in wars and traveled the world needs my help. Men. Lol. I’m happy to do it but I think it’s getting to the kids. It’s just so different from our usual routine….going over there during the day to an empty house, going grocery shopping more often than usual, etc. They are starting to act out and it’s throwing me for a loop. I find myself turning on them when I should be turning to them. I feel awful for that.

I have been trying to still take them to fun places and distract them/myself from what is going on but they, especially Louis, know something is up. Since Judy was born, we have only gone down to Florida a few times but Louis remembers great grandpa. Loves him. Thought his house (retirement home) was amazing. Pretends his chair is a wheelchair so he can be like great grandpa. I just don’t know how to tell him what is happening. He knows grandma is visiting great grandpa because he is sick. I don’t know how to tell him that he won’t get to see his great grandpa again.

All I hope for is that this is all going to get better.

 

 

3 Replies to “Misplaced Musings”

  1. It’s a beautiful and perfect ❤❤

  2. Mary Mendiola says: Reply

    So sorry, Kristen. I know how hard this is. Praying for all of you. ♡

    1. Thank you, I appreciate it so much xoxo

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